Static...more static

One of my favourite sounds in the world is that of an electronic device crackling softly in the background. It sounds like a desperate human being who is trying his best to get something out of his larynx, but the sound will just not come out. As a baby, my mum used to keep me amused by pulling the cable off the tv....suddenly the whole screen would turn into a myriad of spots; black and white. It was my idea of wonderland. That was 21 years back.

I still love the sound of static(I prefer the amplitude to be much lower). It is bliss to hear the overhead microphone scratch itself as the captain prepares to announce the landing in Hyderabad. I am home and am going to stay here for another 2 and a half months. It is indeed amazing how even helL can sound rosy when you’re doing well at it....I had an absolute blast in the third term, the questionnaire for smile gave me ‘job satisfaction’.

Have my dream profile:- SAP CRM; dream company:- IBM and most importantly.............AM HOME BABY!!

Twisted minds....Twistier thinking

Ever been to a party and looked at this really slutty looking chick. Low cut blouse, a slit in her skirt running up, her arm around a couple of guys at all times and knocking back a couple of drinks every few minutes. If you thought one of these guys is actually going out with her, chances are you are an amateur in this complex world where affairs are increasingly being given another word - friendship.

Now dont get me wrong, I am sure you already have. I dont mean to say that you cannot go out with a girl without having any feelings for her. You can... if you dont find that girl hot(how many really bad looking women out there?.....why would you go out with her in the first place :) or if there is a more compelling reason why you wont hit on her(your fucking best friend's girlfriend). Why else would any guy with an itch in his crotch desist from making a move?

I am born with two left feet and this leads to me seeking the company of more left feet at a party. What do you think men do when they have nothing to do and blends of ethyl alcohol in their hands. They bitch.... far worse than women. The detailing is amazing....part by part....in scales that even Prof.____ wouldn't have conceived and towards the end of the consensus, one detail is always common. No matter how much you wanted to go home with the slutty chick, you end up feeling sorry for the man she actually goes out with. He is probably banging some other 'friend' of his but what the heck; I am a man and I can surely give a fellow the benefit of the doubt.

Another extremity is making someone your 'sister'. WTF???. I have known situations where:-
1) Guy finds girl hot, wants to screw her.
2) Girl doesn't want guy to screw her but wouldn't mind hanging out with him. The tag 'friend' cannot be over abused here since everyone knows guy's itch. What does she do?
3) She makes him her 'brother'. How freaking ridiculous. This is exactly why I dont believe in rakshabandan.

I am not saying its wrong. I am not asking you not to do it. I am just saying....dont abuse the garb of friendship for it. Have the guts to admit to yourself what you are doing. Its no surprise that the new line for "wanna go to bed with me" has become.....you guessed it. "Want to have friendship"????

Why the sudden outpouring of emotion...this is what happens when Praveen wakes up at 5 in the morning with his head feeling like a ship's anchor.

I will sign off with a few dialogues. I vouch for their authenticity:-
Good:-
"I got so drunk yesterday that I have no idea what happened. I am sure my 'friend' took 'care' of me"

Better:-
"I think Delhi is an unsafe city for women. I mean women getting raped and all that.....I am going out today to a disc with my 'friends' will be back late in the night"

The Very Best:-
"Is it not okay if I sleep with two men at night. That way, neither would make a move on me!!".

If Eve was the only damn chick around. Who can blame Adam?

Diploma...TAMCOMM23...Fist...Stumped...SMILE

IIM Lucknow hosted its 22nd convocation today. A day when 250 young men and women(yes there were lots in the senior batch) donned sombre black coats, and tried to bow through their burgeoning bellies; to receive a paper for which they have gone through helL for the past 2(or sometimes 3) years. There was a sense of pride in the air with proud parents lining up the chairs and politely applauding each name that was called. All 250 have been picked up by top notch companies where these 'strategic assets' are going to make a big difference to the top line. What a load of crap!

There was a party hosted by TAMCOMM23. For the uninitiated, this may sound like a passkey to exotica but when expanded, it reads "Tamil committee (batch no) 23". The set of students whose mother tongue (in my case only mother) happens to be Tamil. I paid Rs.1000/- for 2 dosas and curd rice. It was delicious though. I had an option of choosing between the 'gult farewell' and the one by 'TAMCOMM23". I chose the later for there were bridges to be made and in some cases, rebuilt. I hate South Indian food!

IIML has now been in existence for 23 years. I am sure PCOM (Placement committee) has been maligned every year. 'HR king' who resides two rooms away made up his mind( he claims it was red wine ) to manhandle PCOM. He hits on Mrs.PCOM and then plants a very drunken fist on one PCOM member who was unfortunate enough to try and stop him. How he escaped being hit that day is still a wonder. 'HR king' then puked all over my room( missed the bucket I had placed for him though)!

I have been a decent batsman all my life. This is not a tall claim. I hit nadir a few days back though. I was stumped first ball.....a sad enough feat. What compounded the agony was that the one who delivered the ball is 'officially' categorised as a member of the female sex. We won the match though and the trophy thanks to some great bowling by our captain. The opposition team cried foul over my strategies. In my defence, I played by the book. We won!

The best is saved for the last. I spent a few good hours of my life writing a proposal to implement kiosks that offer digital services across India. SMILE interactive tech group was glad to accept it. Now me, bihar, fraud iBanker and 3 others are spending a good amount of time being MBAs and formulating strategies for its implementation.

Potatoes and Capsicum in the mess await. Cant bear it any longer.

P.S:- My elective list in the second year read Agri-Business, Finance and HR. Beat that.